An exact copy of an email you are about to get if you are in the know:
Dear Class of 2001,
I don’t know about you, but I personally still have yet to get in the habit of dating notes with a ’15 instead of a ’14. While you like me may be schlepping into the new year in a mild state of disbelief, it seems time to acknowledge that 2015 is upon us and our fifteenth reunion is next year.
I’ll give you all a moment to let that sink in: fif-teen.
In light of this impending celebration of everything green, griffin, and Guster-y, we have some things to discuss. First, I’d like to officially make you all aware that Ms. Becky Deusser has stepped into the position of Class President. Becky has served on our class board for 1,837 years and has already shown reliable, cool-headed leadership. We as members of the board would like to thank former president Gina Finocchiario for her service in ushering us towards this upcoming reunion and for Becky graciously picking up the baton in the home stretch.
Second, we have a party to plan. This is the work of the ages, people, and we need your help. Several of your board members gathered over cocktails in Willits (right near the copier strategically placed in the upstairs bar) this past fall to discuss preliminary plans and listen to extensive training on Where We May Consume Alcohol and Who May Serve It. This was a labor of love and we can’t wait to find creative ways to work around everything we learned.
I’ll be heading up the planning this year and I would love to hear from you about what you need to make reunion 2016 everything you have ever dreamt it could be. Do you need to dance to ’90s jams in your jammies? Do you require erudite lectures from your favorite profs? Do you need cookies? Culture? Burritos? Canoes? Networking? Networking *in* canoes? Lots of time to reconnect with your favorite classmates without people like me barking at you about where you need to be?
Your wish is my command, friends.*
Please email me directly at email@example.com or hit me up on Facebook if that’s your jam. We want to make you happy and, while every woman loves to have her mind read and every whim attended to, I’m not a certain tycoon in an E. L. James novel here to deliver you a red Audi hatchback just because I want to keep you safe.**
…but I do want you safe and happy and gasping with glee, dear classmates– and, most importantly, I want you *at* the reunion. Tell me what it’s going to take to see your beautiful faces there.
I wish you all a wonderful and generous FebruMary and can’t wait to shake it to some sweet N*sync or become 32 flavors with each of you next spring.
All the best,
Elizabeth Syben King ’01
**can you believe I went there? I cannot. Won’t happen again. Total one-time thing. Swear.